Contrary to what your trouble-making brain may tell you, a date isn’t a high-stakes referendum on your personal appeal. Pressure begins to build the moment you forget that a date is only dinner and a movie in the company of someone who may or may not be very interesting. But when all is said and done, external factors play a smaller role in your stress level than something much closer to home: your own mind.
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Go on a first date If your pencil hovered for even a moment over any answer but “d,” you definitely need to read on. Because you’ve just shown yourself to be one of the unfortunate millions for whom dating has become “more stressful than it’s worth.” Sure, it’s true that dating is more complex and stress-inducing than it used to be, with shifting gender roles and continuously evolving social norms.
It isn’t your “last chance” at companionship, as if God put only so many quarters in your romantic parking meter and time is running out before you wind up in the impound.
Nor do you have a “sell by” date stamped on your head like a milk carton, after which you start to stink. Most singles struggle with some variation of these silly ideas. Psychologists tell us that what people regret most are not mistakes they’ve made, but opportunities they’ve missed.
With so much riding on a single evening, it’s no wonder a date can be so panic-inducing. Take everything you know about a successful job interview — and throw it out the window. Going on a date might not lead to lasting love — but then again it might.
As an antidote, here are three things to regularly remind yourself about. A date is not an opportunity to double-check your qualifications against a job description. Who knows, your next date could turn out to be the love of your life.
It is a time to be “off the clock,” to hang out with another human being and enjoy some conversation and a few laughs. ” “What if I can’t stand her and have to sit through dinner anyway?
And you’re more likely to learn important things about each other without the self-imposed performance pressure. Don’t let your mind play stressful “what if” games.
Some studies show that many people are struggling to make their personal activities, including vacation, shopping and dates due to work pressures.
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It is best to know what you really want and what you prefer when it comes to these things.
It is a direct response that you can test a profile against another so you do not be bamboozeled in a non-functional relationship.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating